Poetry For The Invisibly Ill

All That Matters

It’s the Little Things That Matter
They’re the things that mean a lot
They’re the things that I can count on
When I’m giving things a thought

Oh there’s lots of big grand gestures
That are meant to mean big things
But in the end, they aren’t the ones
That tug at my heartstrings

I prefer the smaller hidden ones
The things that seem quite shy
The little acts that are given out
Not meant to catch your eye

It’s the little things that matter
That make a quiet sound
I love them best from all the rest
They make the world go round

by Pamela Jesssen

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I’m fighting a battle that no one can see
Invisible Illness, it’s all inside me
On the outside, I’m perfect, look healthy and fit
But inside is different, and I’m all over it

Pain is my companion each day and each night
And Chronic Fatigue is something else that I fight
My body is aching, from my head to my toes
How long can I do this, God only knows

There’s a feeling of throbbing in all of my joints
My hands and my feet feel like stabbing pinpoints
I’m shaky and trembling and can’t stand up long
And yet on the outside, I look so damn strong

My heart feels so weary each new day I face
The world ’round me screams I must pick up my pace
But my spoons are all gone and I’ve none left to give
And I’m telling you now, this is no way to live

And yet…

There is still hope inside me, and I must be strong
There are good days ahead and for those days I long
I still have my loved ones who stand at my side
My husband’s amazing, my kids are my pride

My cat loves to cuddle, she seeks out my lap
I love her, she’s purrfect, a warm furry wrap
My garden is growing, there’s roses galore
Hydrangeas, Marigolds, Pansies and more

I’ve good books to read and Netflix to binge
Avengers! The X-Men! Superheros! (don’t cringe!)
A good movie can take my mind off of my pain
And there’s several I don’t mind watching again

What I’m trying to say is there are good things in life
And I have to cling on to them, despite any strife
For these are the things that help me get through the days
We all have our tricks, and we all have our ways

I’m grateful for everything and I often give praise
For the sunrise, the sunset and all the good days
Days when I manage the pain and don’t fade
When I come out on top and know I’ve got it made

There are so many people who are worse off than me
And I try to remember them, for they help me see
that my life may hold pain, but that’s not my whole life
I’m a friend, and a mother, an advocate and wife

I’m able to offer my time and my skills
I volunteer often (despite all my pills)
I help to make healthcare better for all
It’s intensive, rewarding and for certain my call

I blog about Health, and I share what I know
There’s a network of us and we continue to grow
I pray for the cures to the issues we face
and I share education, in my little blog space

So, my life really isn’t all that bad in the end
It’s all about attitude, and sometimes I pretend
That pain doesn’t grip me, fatigue isn’t there
Fake it til you make it, even if it’s not fair

Life is a choice, and I choose to smile
Despite any hardships, it’s just not my style
To wither and whine or to despair with no hope
I refuse to sink down, so throw me that rope

My friend, make the most of all that you’ve got
Life is short and we’re only given one shot
Look to the bright side, and may joy be your friend
From now to forever, beginning to end

There is Always Hope

by Pamela Jessen

All rights reserved. Copyright 2019 by Pamela Jessen. These works may not be reprinted without the permission of the author.

Pamela Jessen lives in Langford, BC Canada. She is a blogger who writes about Chronic Pain, Chronic Fatigue and Invisible Illness at pamelajessen.com.  She also writes for The Mighty, PainResource.com and various independent publications. Pamela is also a Patient Advocate with the Patient Voices Network in BC. She sits on 4 committees and one Provincial working group and has also been involved in advocacy work at the Canadian National level as well. Pamela is married to her amazing husband Ray and they have one cat named Dorie. 

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